in third grade we were learning about measurements of distance and so my class had to go outside one day and walk around this little area and we were supposed to walk toe- to-heel and count how many steps it took us to make the square but I didn’t pay attention when the teacher was telling us so when I got to her I heard the kid in front of me say 40 or something and I thought we just had to say a random number so I told my teacher 200 and she looked down at my feet really quickly with her eyes all big and my point is it took me fifteen years to figure out why she seemed so shocked

thranduilings:

Diva Legolas Part 26: If You Don’t Reblog This I Will Tell Dad

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(via consultingrainbowteaboy)

celestial-sexhair:

me as a celebrity

(Source: hummelilde, via consultingrainbowteaboy)

tonystarks:

"She’s just a supporting character!" Your spine’s just a supporting structure, wanna see how well you do when it’s ripped out? [x]

(via thatgirltheyknow)

thefarfire:

david-tennants-little-fangirl:

neverthehurricane:

sherlockchins:

sunshien:

my mom asked why i don’t read as many books as i used to and i just said it was because i read a lot of unpublished stories from independent writers online and she thinks that’s very good of me to give undiscovered authors a chance

hahaha

i just read gay porn

#unpublished stories from independent writers online

#so that’s what we’re calling it now

image

Never stop reblogging this

(via derpsplosion)

blackumi:

supra—hero:

dreamofflight:

letslivelikejackandsally:

we’re all getting arrested for this

I have to believe the President would die laughing at these.

Lol that guitar one!

The fucking last one lmfao

(Source: pleatedjeans, via angiepangie486)

isnerdy:

rj4gui4r:

slussy:

Frankenstein enters into a body building competition and finds he has seriously misunderstood the objective

FOR THE LAST TIME, FRANKENSTEIN WAS THE NAME OF THE DOCTOR

…a doctor who built a body.

(via angiepangie486)

midget-banana:

hijackspace:

thehttydblog:

modern-hiccup:

Me and my sibling can go from

image

to

image

in like three seconds 

#MY LIFE

on a scale from disney to dreamworks what’s your sibling relationship

MARVEL

image

(via ask-one-eyed-allfather)

My skin has turned to porcelain, to ivory, to steel.

(Source: stilinski-the-vampire-slayer, via marty-mc)

violentnewcontinent:

latefines:

papervaglife:

ugly-privilege:

beben-eleben:

Collective names for some animals

dumbfounded a murder of crows isn’t on here.

my english told me that a group of unicorns is called a blessing and thats the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard

MURDER

Oh man venereal nouns are my thing. I have a book somewhere. 

A thicket of idiots is still my fave.

(via derpsplosion)